Audit in Progress

10.”You’ve got a lovely pair of W-2’s.”
9.”Please, baby, let me withhold you.”
8.”Technically, having sex with me is a charitable gift.”
7.”In my office, ‘I.R.S.’ stands for ‘I’m really sexy.’ “
6.”If I help you screw Uncle Sam, can I be next?”
5.”You’re entitled to a $5,000 tax break on your municipal bond income…now let’s do it.”
4.”Let’s fill out a 1040 — you’re a 10, and I’m 40.”
3.”You’re the kind of girl I could take home to mother - which is good, since I still live with her.”
2.”Lady, you make my pants file for an extension.”
1.”Nice assets.”
As presented by New York City-area accountants

Top 10 Signs You Work in Public Accounting/Consulting

10. You lecture the neighborhood kids selling lemonade on ways to improve their processes.
9. You get all excited it’s Saturday so you can wear casual clothes to work.
8. You refer to the tomatoes in your garden as deliverables.
7. You find you really need PowerPoint to explain what you do for living.
6. You normally eat out of vending machines and at the most expensive restaurant in town within the same week.
5. You wear gray to work instead of navy blue to make a bold fashion statement.
4. You know the people at the airport and hotel better than your next door neighbors.
3. Ask your friends to “think out of box” when making Friday night plans. 
2. You think Einstein would have been more effective had he put his ideas into a matrix.
1. You think a “half-day” means leaving at 5 o’clock.

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